All parents hope that their children will be able to grow up comfortably, achieve good results at school, and be successful in their future careers. There is no formula to grooming an elite child, who can be successful. However psychologists have discovered that a child’s success in adulthood will depend greatly on the education that he receives from his parents at home. And if parents adhere to the following habits, their children can be predictably successful.
The U.S. education system has studied parents with successful children and often they have these 10 common characteristics.
6. Teaching their children early mathematics
A meta-analysis conducted in 2007 on 35,000 kindergartens across the United States, Canada, and the United Kingdom proved the great importance of letting children learn math skills in childhood, And the best way is to equip children with the basic concepts of mathematics, numbers, and sequence numbers before starting school. Researcher Greg Duncan—from Northwestern University, also a co-author and researcher said, “For young children who can master the basic concepts of mathematics, it is possible to predict not only their academic achievement of mathematics, but also their future successes.”
7. Creating good relationships with their children
A study that was conducted in 2014 with 243 people born in poverty showed that children who receive the attentive care from their parents in the first 3 years of life, not only had better academic records in childhood, but also had good, sustainable relationships and achieve higher levels of education until they were over 30 years old. According to a report posted on PsyBlog, parents who care for children with all their hearts often “can promptly and appropriately respond to their children’s signals,” while providing children with a sense of security and confidence to explore the world.
Lee Raby, a psychologist at the University of Minnesota, concluded in his interview: “In the first place, parents focused on building good relationships with their children, is to bring long-term repayment for parents later.”
8. Being less stressed
Last year, The Washington Post published a new study by Brigid Schulte. discovered that the amount of time parents spend with their children from 3 to 11 years old has nothing to do with the behavior, happiness, and success of children in the future. Yet overcare and overparenting, may have bad influences on them because according to Kei Nomaguchi, sociologist at Bowling Green State University and co-author of the study “The stresses of mothers, especially when they have trouble at work and are trying to spend time with their children, really have a negative impact on them.” This is called “emotional spread,” a very common psychological phenomenon. If parents feel happy, this will spread to the children and make them feel happy too. Similarly, if parents often feel stressed or sad, they will pass that negative emotion on to their children. Therefore, parents should spend quality time with their children in the early stages of life instead of quantity.
9. Paying attention to the process, without worrying about the outcome
From a child’s perspective on success, we can also predict his future. Stanford University psychologist Carol Dweck discovered that children (including adult children) have two different ways of looking at success:
Fixed thinking—that is if we think that our personality, intelligence, and creative capacity are fixed, and success is a combination of these factors to achieve the intended goals, we will do everything to succeed based on maintaining intelligence and skills.
Development thinking—that is, when we think that failure is not due to not being smart enough, but considering failure as a driving force for development, an experience that helps increase one’s own survival ability.
These two ways of thinking strongly influence a child’s ability. If parents tell them that they get good grades because of their intelligence, they will form fixed thinking. On the other hand, if they think they have achieved results through their own efforts, they will have development thinking.
10. The mother has a stable job
According to Harvard research, it is the mother’s stable job that will have significant impacts on the development of the child later. They compared and concluded: Daughters whose mothers have a job, outside the home, are 23 percent more likely to go to school and hold supervisory responsibility jobs and earn higher wages than those whose mothers do not work. The sons of working mothers will often do housework and help their parents take care of younger siblings more than children with mothers staying at home. Specifically, children whose mothers go to work, spend time each day taking care of younger siblings more than half an hour, the time of doing housework is 25 minutes more than the rest.
Harvard professor Kathleen L. McGinn the leader of the study concluded: “Parents are models for educating children about concepts, and behaviors in life. If the mother also works, then children will have a good idea of gender equality.”
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